People and Personalities

When your partner becomes pregnant, especially the first time, you can often be left feeling as an unwanted observer by the many "personalities" that revel themselves during this time, interfering with things that should be respected as your relationship matters. That is what this page is about. How do you deal with these personalities so you experience the involvement in your pregnancy that you and your partner think is appropriate.

When you start having children, it is supposed to be an amazing time for you. You are starting your own family. Yet for some reason, these months can feel like a battleground, where it seems you have to fight for input into private matters that should be respected as being "family matters". Don't worry, you are definitely are not on your own in this regard.

 

To begin with, understand that you ARE starting your family. Once you recognise and come to understand this, you will have a nice little yardstick to measure whether the personalities getting involved with the pregnancy are adding value to your process, or are interfering in your process.

 

Two simple questions you can ask yourself when you think people are pushing too far are:

  • Would this type of behavior be accepted or tolerated if my partner was not pregnant?
  • Would I feel comfortable interfering in this person's family, in the same fashion they are interfering in mine, if our roles were reversed.

You would be surprised at how often the answers to either or both of these questions will be "No". And if your honest opinion is that the answer to these questions is "No", you can be pretty confident that the personality in question is not helping your process, but interfering in it.

 

When this happens, it is important to do something about it immediately. You do not want these people bringing up your children do you? Of course you don't! They have just proved they do not respect your boundaries and that is not the type influence you want in your childrens' formative years. If you do not nip these things in the bud early, it is entirely likely you will let a pattern of interference develop that is nigh on impossible to sort out later. It is time to politely but firmly establish boundaries with these people and ensure they respect where their family finishes and your family starts.

 

The articles below are examples of such occurrences happening to others and how they were overcome. We hope they give you some good ideas, these issues are never easy to deal with:

 


 

I See Me! Personalized Children's Books

 

 

 

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